Skyrim Widow = Halo Widow

This article made me laugh. The writer’s boyfriend got Skyrim and widowed her for a few days. I hear Skyrim is amazing and I’m probably glad that Mike’s not really into those sort of games. Felicia Day has many things to say about it, as well as other Twitterers, but I haven't seen it in action and don't know that I will (or need to because I might really, really like it).

The thing I found most entertaining about the article was the experiments she performed on him. I know, of course, that she didn’t really check his pupils and attach heart monitors to him, but it was funny nonetheless. It would never work for me to do such things; I’d likely be in the way of the game. As it is, I’ve figured out how to ninja through our living room, where Mike sits at one end, the 61 inch TV at the other with about 7 feet between them (enough space between the TV and the couch for me to play Dance Central).  
Also, the writer's own private addiction to Plants vs. Zombies… anyone who knows me knows my feelings about this game. Simply put, I love the Zombies. There’ve been several, several occasions where I’ve spent hours playing and not even realized how much time has gone by.  Not to mention all of the other fun tower defense games on the interwebs… Kingdom Rush, Pirates vs. Ninjas, Overlord II Tower Defense. Space Pirates, I still hate you the most (but you are conquered, so there).

This has been the least Halo related blog, but honestly, I’ve been wrapped up in school and books. I’ll pay attention when Mike is able to play the new maps so I can see them and have something new to talk about. Or. I’ll just pay attention to what game he’s playing until I figure it out. Until then, game on. And a new pretty for your eyeballs to look at. 

HaloFest

  For those of you who weren't informed, this year marks the 10th anniversary of Halo: Combat Evolved. This calls for a celebration! That celebration was HaloFest.

    PAX Prime is huge. The entire event takes up the 4 stories of the convention center and over flows into the annex across Pike street and the Paramount Theater. HaloFest was a part of PAX Prime, meaning that your PAX badge would get you in to HaloFest as well. But HaloFest was definitely a totally separate experience. Inside the incredibly well put together area, all other games were lost. It was all about Halo and there were some incredible representations of the universe that was created for the players to escape into. That escape was real for the 3 days that the event covered.

  There were several game areas set up where anyone could sit or stand and play a round of Firefight or Big Team Battle with the other Halo lovers in the room. I even picked up a controller a few times, just so they could start the game. I got my ass handed to me in the Big Team Battle and Free for All matches that I played but I got my first and second double kill playing Firefight. Mike had a good time exploring the title update which had changes that he was really excited about.

  There were several lounges set up and some really great demonstrations. Forza 4 for the Kinect will include the Warthog as one of the vehicle choices and there was an area where you could use the Kinect and play with the Warthog in your garage. There was also Fruit Ninja Kinect set up with a special edition HaloFest background. It was awesome to see the ninja disappear when the Active Camo fruit was sliced. The Halo Fruit Ninja isn't going to be available for download though. Or so they say.

   The Commissary had the most fantastic part of HaloFest: The Grunt Plushies with a limit of 3 for the first 2 days, then the limit was lifted on the third. They were also selling exclusive HaloFest toys and shirts. And they handed out really neat shoulder bags with a set of MegaBlocks Warthog blocks to the first 5000 people. That's a lot of people, but PAX hosted 70,000 people and I heard some pretty disappointed people towards the end of the three days. I also saw that the special edition MegaBlocks are being sold on eBay and I think that if you didn't want one, why did you take one? And how could you sell that super cute, tiny, little plasma sword? Really people. But I digress...

  We were fortunate enough to get invited to the HaloFest VIP party put on by Microsoft's 343 Studio. Mike and I spent Friday night from 8-11 mingling with other Halo lovers, 343 employees and a handful of other internet and Halo VIP's. We met Major Nelson, Stepto, Marty O'Donnell, Burnie Burns (squee!!) and a few other people. Also, there was cake. Enough cake for 1000 people.

  David Ellis hosted a costume contest with about a dozen incredibly well put together costumes. My vote was most certainly for Marissa's bunny in the Noble 6 armor, but a really well done Spartan took the win. The costumes were amazing. I'll upload them to a sharable site when they're ready.

  It was an excellent event hosted by excellent people. I can't thank the 343 team enough for what they did.

  Also, Luke McKay, next time you and I make eye contact 200 times in 3 days, I promise I'll stop being a pansy and say hello, maybe even get you to sign the first comic book I ever purchased because it was drawn by you.

  I don't care what anyone says. The reason we went to PAX Prime this year was for HaloFest. Next year, if there is no HaloFest, we'll probably go for PAX's sake, but this year... no.

Fellowship of the Game pt. 2

  There was entirely too much awesome for me to be able to chronicle every moment. I was so exhausted by the end of every day that I could barely clear the memory card of pictures before passing out. I apologize for the delay in reporting but I do intend to chronicle what is now referred to as "Rukari-Fest" and all 3 days of HaloFest and PAX Prime for your reading pleasure. And I took about a million pictures, so there's that too.

 Downtown Seattle on a Thursday morning is an interesting place. I really love Seattle so I'm never going to complain about it. I'll just always make sure to be extra cautious for the cars around me because I'm pretty sure they're not watching for me at all. But I digress. Mike and I arrived downtown and parked. 

  Rukari (aka rukizzel) got in touch with Mike about 11 AM and we met up with him and Scott from Canada (aka Das Kalk). Then, a whole bunch of other guys showed up including Kevin Hurd*, MrMiagy, TheLightShow & Marissa's Bunny GrimBrotherOne & GrimBrotherFour, HyperTrooper from Germany and KalamariKid. And about a dozen other guys who's names I can't remember but were all really awesome to hang out with. 

  The local buddy, Rukari, made a few suggestions about what we could do for the day, after an obligatory tourist visit to the incredibly disgusting gum wall. We divided up between cars and drove to Gorditos Mexican Restaraunt and then we were headed to Bellevue to see... BUNGIE HEADQUARTERS!

  I drove my neon with Mike in the front seat and Grim Brothers in the backseat and another young man from Arizona that I'm really sorry I didn't ever hear his name and felt too awkward to ask later. Also, I apologize to my passengers for my lack of finding places ability but thanks for sharing the adventure with us anyway. We did find the restaurant, obviously and the food was awesome. We fit 15 people around tables. Mike and I mingled. It was excellent.

  We piled back into the cars and I immediately got us lost trying to find Bungie. But... everything happens for a reason. We were the last to arrive at the Bungie Headquarters and just as we were getting there, Rukari and the rest were deciding to just take some pictures and go, lower lips tripping them up all the way. But who comes up the escalator, just as we start towards it? Urk. And he invited us in. All 15 of us at one time!

  They geeked out instantly. Every one of them. I mean really, really hard core geeking. It was awesome. I felt the tingle of excitement myself as we walked into the sacred room and peered down the hall to see a life size master chief looking down at us. Whoa.

 They also had scale replicas of a Carbine, Sniper Rifle, Gravity Hammer and I think it was a Bubble Shield. So what did they do? Played with the giant weapons of course. And I took pictures with a smile on my face. If there's one thing a Halo widow loves it's to see her Halo Lover happy. And boy was he ever!

 We headed back downtown after that and all went our separate ways. Rukari and a few other friends stayed downtown all night at the front of the line. I hear there were even XBOX's down there at one point. Rukari stayed in line all night to be the first inside HaloFest in the morning. And he was. 

  We met up with a couple of the guys and had some drinks later that night. Then, we met new friends from our home state at a different bar. At midnight, we dragged our tired feet back to the car with Grim Brothers and friend in tow, headed back to the hotel in Sea-Tac. We made plans to head back to Seattle very early and then slept fast and hard until 5 AM.

  I've written about the fellowship of gaming, and I got to see it in action again today. It's incredible that strangers who only know each other through their voices over the internet and a spread of community forums, can sit and be so comfortable with each other. It was a lot of fun to meet up with the people Mike's known for a while now. I'm finally be able to put faces to some of the muffled voices I hear through his headset and shake the hands that type some of the tweets I see. Thanks guys for a great Thursday. I'll tell all about Friday tomorrow. 

How the Living Dead Playlist Works

  Zombies: walking dead people searching for walking live people for both nutritional purposes and to make more Zombies. See, we’re wrong when we think about Zombies as mindless beings; they’re not. They have a dual motive and they’re quite effective at achieving their short-term goals. I mean when they see something they want, they stop at nothing to get it. Oh, to have that much dedication.

  But I digress. This is supposed to be about Zombies in Halo Reach.

  Alpha Zombies and Infected will be two of the game types presented in the Living Dead playlist. From my understanding, they’re basically the same game, except in Alpha Zombies, the zombies have infinite run, which means that as long as they’re moving forward, they’re moving fast. Zombies also jump higher but they can be taken out with one kill.

  It works like this: Twelve players go into the game.  A few of them, I think two or three, start as Zombies. These guys are going to try to kill the Spartans and make more Zombies to run around and kill the rest of the Spartans. Eventually, there will be a last man standing. Once he’s or she is turned into a Zombie, the round is over. Three rounds make a match.  At the end of the match, the highest number of kills wins. There’s a timer on the match, but I’ve never seen it run out so I’m not really sure how long it lasts. This game goes quick.

  I think the best maps for playing the Living Dead games are ones with lots of corners and cubbies for hiding in. Reflection is a good map for this reason. If you’re not sure which one Reflection is, I like to think of it like a really fancy doctors office with weird elevators and a Koi pond. Now, with the plentitude of hiding spaces you’ve got to watch out for Zombies and a lot of the players find that the camping strategy works well in this game type, regardless of whether you’re Zombie or human. Hole up and wait for someone to kill. Or you’re just waiting for everyone else to become a Zombie. I think that the major advantage for the last man standing would be the number of kills you could get if all the Zombies come running at you at once. FUN!

  Now, the weapons. When you’re a Zombie you get a Plasma Sword. Close combat means you’re more likely to die. You’re even more likely to die because the humans have guns, just like we will when the Zombies come for us.  The guns are Shotguns and Pistols. Headshots aplenty, as long as you don’t run out of bullets. Then, you’re in for close combat with Zombies and I think you know what that means. (If not, return to the beginning of this ditty and start reading again.)

  To me, Zombies seems fun, but frustrating because of the amount of potential deaths. But… being the Zombie can be fun, and just because you’re really good at being the last man standing doesn’t mean you can get the most kills. Some players are ninja Zombies with the Sword.

  The Magic of Halo doesn’t skip over this game type, so be aware that some bullets can turn corners and sometimes that Plasma Sword in your hand is just a figment of your imagination and passes right through opponents.

  So, with that being typed, I think you should go give the Living Dead playlist a try.

The Magic of Halo

  Every gamer, on any console or system, knows that games have glitches. They’re programs, written by humans and they are bound to have some problems that the developers weren’t able to work out for various reasons. Be it that they never applied the exact combination of movements that causes the glitch or that they found it but couldn’t repair it through system patches, the games we play aren’t perfect. Whatever, we deal with it or we don't play the game.


  It can be said that some games have more of these glitches than normal. It can also be said that the more you play a game, the more likely you are to encounter it’s glitches which makes it seem like there are so many more. However they happen, Halo has glitches and with the number of games that I’ve seen, there are quite a few. But we love Halo, and glitches are bad, (and I can find a positive spin to almost anything) so I’ve decided to call it Halo’s magic.

  As with any magic, it can work for or against you. For example, this morning I was watching Mike play Gruntpocalypse and he threw a grenade, as he’s apt to do while playing Gruntpocalypse. We both saw the grenade blow up and one grunt die. Then, a few seconds after the explosion but before any extra shots had been fired, another Grunt died. What the...? Of course when you’re playing Gruntpocalypse alone and a Grunt dies, you get the kill for it so this is a good thing but there's no explanation for it other than magic. Somtimes the magic takes that rocket you just fired really, really far across the map (farther than the rockets have ever gone before) and kills three people when it does land. The magic is in your favor.

  Sometimes the magic works against you. There are times, I’ve seen it happen, when bullets come through walls or around corners to kill Mike or other players that he’s gaming with. Someone else gets the kill, of course, so the magic is in their favor. But whenever the other guy has the magic on his side, you do not. Magic gives the other player an unfair advantage and it's frustrating to the non-magical players, or muggles if you prefer.

  Sometimes, the magic is on the games side (assuming the game doesn’t want you to win) and things like betrayals by Warthogs from heaven happen or you bounce when you hit the water at the bottom of a waterfall, just to add insult to injury.

  Yet we keep playing. Why? In hopes that the magic will be on our side. In hopes that the magic will take a side seat for a few games and just let things happen. More often than not, the magic only plays a small part. And for more casual gamers, they rarely see the magic at all. But for those of you that get the glitches, suffer the gremlins, just try to imagine it's magic. And sometimes, just sometimes, the magic will be on your side.

The Fellowship of the Game

  Tonight, Mike hosted a Waypoint Community Carnage Night in honor of one of the community members who was recently killed in a car accident. A bunch of players that knew the member met up and they played a few games. It got me thinking about how none of these guys, or ladies, really know each other (with a very few exceptions) and yet when one of them is hurt, or worse, the other players and members feel the loss as if it were a closer friend.



  There’s a camaraderie amongst the gaming community, a fellowship if you will. These people don’t know each other outside of the games they share, but they know each other from the conversations they’ve had. Some times the guys will share stories about their day, sometimes they’ll open yell at their kids to go to bed or complain about their wife until she makes them turn off the game. (I call this being “wifed” and I make fun of the wives that do it.) No matter what they’re talking about, the people on the friends list are more than just random players.



  Sometimes the opportunity to meet the other players in real life happens, like what happened for us at ECCC, and it’s always neat to meet people and put a body to a face, gestures to a body, the sound of their voice without a microphone. We’ll probably meet a few more people at PAX. And PAX is what I imagine to be a humongous gathering of members of the fellowship. I can’t wait to see who else we’ll run in to. 

How Rocket Hogs Works

  I was sitting on the couch killing zombies on my phone* when I heard the familiar “oohh ho-hoooooooo!” that means that things are getting amazing in the game. So, I decided to watch because I like it when the game is amazing. I quickly realized that I had no idea what I was watching and I had to figure it out.



  Rocket Hog is one of the game-types that can happen when playing multi-team playlists. There are four teams of three players; each team is given a Warthog. I didn’t realize that three guys could fit in a Warthog, but they do. Then, they race to a glowing ring somewhere on the map. I think the game works best on maps like Hemorrhage because of the size. When the first team reaches the destination, the destination moves and the race continues. Points are awarded for reaching the destination.

 But like any game, there are challenges in the race. First, there’s the other players. Everyone on the map is moving in the same direction – towards the destination. This means that they’re not watching for you. it also means that if they die, they’re going to respawn somewhere else. I saw one race last night where Mike and his friends were about 100 meters from the destination and one of the other teams spawned in practically inside the glowing ring. Even I said “awwww” when I saw what happened.

  There are also landmines scattered all over the map. The landmines are kind of a Catch-22. They can destroy your Warthog or throw another Warthog into yours. This of course causes your entire teams demise. Then, there’s the wait for the respawn. (It never seems to work out that Mike and his teams' spawn in anywhere close to the destination.) But, the landmines also fling your Warthog into barrel rolls which are counted by the game. This means you can get a medal. Yay! Rewards are fun. Last night, Mike and his team did a really nice, Matrix-esque barrel roll. And landed it. I was impressed.
 
  And with a name like Rocket Hogs, there’s gotta be rockets. Mike was the gunner (rocketer?) last night. I like rockets because of the hissing sound and the explosions. In the race, rockets make a mess. When a rocket hits a Warthog, the Warthog blows up in a fiery explosion of car parts and Spartans. Sometimes, they hit other Warthogs and mayhem ensues.

 So that’s Rocket Hogs in a nutshell. Maybe you should pick it next time it’s one of your game-type choices. Give it a try.

*If you’ve heard the end credits to Plants vs Zombies know that killing zombies on my phone fits into the lyrics quite nicely. Go Windows Phone 7!

…You Might Be A Halo Widow.

  I saw something with Jeff Foxworthy in it recently. He’s pretty fun, if not over done. Anyway, I’m sure most people know about the “… you might be a redneck” jokes. They’re like a checklist of things that rednecks do, say or are so that a person can easily identify whether they are or know someone who is a redneck. I thought it might be nice if I did the same kind of public service announcement, in case you were wondering if you are one, or if you’ve made one.
 
  If you’ve ever waited for the screen to say “respawn in **” seconds before crossing the room… you might be a Halo widow.
 
  If you browse the internet in quick 60-90 second bursts, between games… you might be a Halo widow.

  If you know that every 7th of the month is off limits for plans… you might be a Halo widow.

  If you’ve given up any space on the walls or shelves in your home for a Halo Shrine… you might be a Halo widow.

  If you’ve ever caught yourself humming the theme music… you might be a Halo widow.

  If you recognize at least one map as a favorite because it’s pretty (mine is the garden one from Halo 3)… you might be a Halo widow.

  If you’ve ever waited for the announcer to call out “Game over.” or even “Round over,” before getting your good night kiss… you might be a Halo widow.

  And finally…

  If you’ve ever made your significant other watch an entire game just to see the splatter you got near the end somewhere… you might have made a Halo widow.

How do you know that you’re a Halo widow?

The Things We Do for Halo

  I’ve taken notice of the release of the last four Halo games. Not because I particularly care for the game, but because I’ve cared for Mike for at least that long and if something matters to him, it matters to me. That’s how good relationships work, I think. Anyway, with PAX Prime just around the corner, I’ve been thinking about the events that I’ve gone to where Halo was a large factor or sometimes even the reason we’re there.

  Sometimes there are very special events that preclude game launches. PAX Prime will most likely be one of them. Another such event that we participated in was the ODST Truck Firefight matches. We drove an hour and a half (I might be exaggerating) to get to Hillsboro, Oregon’s Game Stop store to see this truck:
Inside the truck has are, I think, ten XBOX 360 consoles and LCD TV’s. They’ve got it set up for a good gaming experience, as long as you don’t mind the mixed up sounds. So, we stood in line and climbed inside and yes, I played a round of Firefight (because they handed me a controller and told me to sit down). I killed three jackals and two grunts. I only died twice. It was one of my best games because I stayed positive. I know. We also scored a really sweet license plate frame. It says: My Other Car is a Warthog.

  I realize that Halo, and Microsoft, are pretty much bff’s at this point so I wasn’t surprised at all to see a Microsoft Games booth at this years Emerald City Comicon. And low and behold, there was Halo. Mike was excited to get the chance to play the new maps. Oh yes, we played Halo at Comicon. They were showing off their new maps, the Defiant Map pack. I played for a few minutes but only because they needed a fourth person for that station. I quickly handed the controller to the first envious little kid I saw watching me. But, with Comicon, comes great costumes and neat people and TONS of Halo fans. There were a lot of the people that Mike knows from the Halo Waypoint there as well. It was really neat to put faces to names. We also met Grif and his super hot wife Gryffin!

  Any fan of video games knows that the really big games get to have midnight release parties. Sometimes the semi-big games get release parties. Some stores just have one every Monday night for S’s & G’s or because they’re always open. I’ve been to the release parties for Halo 3, Halo Wars and ODST. I didn’t go to the Reach release. I don’t know why. The midnight release party goes like this in our town: people begin gathering in front of the game store at about 10 PM. People of all ages gather. My particular favorite are the parents of the teenagers that stand in the line and watch as their sons and daughters mingle with the other teenagers. Sometimes the store’s employees will come out and give away swag or just provide general entertainment. Eventually, the store opens, the people get their game, and everyone goes home happy. We’re usually home by 12:30 on these types of nights. Perfect time for me to go to bed while Mike spends the next 24-36 hours breaking in his new game.

  So, there are many more things to do with Halo than just play the game. There’s an entire social scene that revolves around it. I’m pretty excited for PAX. Maybe we’ll get to meet more cool and interesting people.

Why I Love Grunts

  Grunts are basically the minions of the Covenant race; they’re purpose is to die. There’s an entire game type named in their honor – Gruntpocolypse. They are also the cutest of all the Halo creatures. Not even the Moa can surpass the Grunt in cuteness.

  I think they’re about five feet tall and almost as wide. They wear masks and armor all the time. It seems to me that they throw themselves into harms way; they’re not that smart. Many times, I’ve seen them running at the players with grenades ready to explode.

  They’re adorable though. Why? Let’s start with the cute little popping sound their heads make when they’re hit. It sounds like a single kernel of popcorn popping, which is about what their brain would amount to. There’s a skull, I think it’s called Birthday Party, that will make a celebration cheering sound (the same one from Viva Piñata, in fact) when they’re shot in the head. It’s fun.

   Did I mention that they’re short, squatty little creatures? They’re movements are all stiff but they can aim their weapons without much effort. I love it when a whole group of them are together and Mike drives a Banshee or Warthog towards them. The way they scatter, the way they move as their running, they look like Ewok’s with arthritis*. Damn that’s cute.

  They have their own language too, although I’m pretty sure they speak whatever English they’ve picked up from the Spartans also. There’s been more than one occasion that I swear I’ve heard them say “oh shit” or call Mike “asshole” before he kills them. And their little voices are so croaky that it sounds silly. They’re like frog voices, if frogs had voices, blabbering gibberish and potty mouthing. Too cute.

  So Grunts, although a nuisance, and basically shunned from all societies, are adorable creatures. Their reckless behavior and poor genetic makeup makes them perfect candidates for the cutest species in the Halo Universe. What’s your favorite creature?

A Moa tries to outrun Mike in a Warthog

 *I know arthritis is a serious condition. I also know that neither Ewoks or Grunts are real creatures, therefore they could not suffer from arthritis. I apologize for any offense I may have caused.

How Grifball Works

  Grifball is an evolved version of football and Russian Roulette. Eight Spartans meet in an big room. They are separated into two teams of four. One “ball” (it’s really a bomb) sits in the center of the room. When the announcer makes the call, all the players rush the ball and try to get possession of it. This person become Grif. Grif is now responsible for getting the ball to the opposite side of the room and placing it on the plant. Once the ball is placed on the plant, it explodes and kills Grif and anyone else near by. The round ends when the bomb explodes and a point is scored. Usually, the best 2 of 3 will win, or 3 of 5. It’s a simple concept.
 

  But like any game, there are obstacles, and reasons that the game is challenging. If Grifball was as simple as running across a room, setting down a ball and watching an explosion, there’d be no sport in it. It makes sense that there would be people trying to stop Grif from scoring points for his team. So, we have the reasons why Grifball doesn’t work.

  Being Grif means that every player in the game is interested in killing you and taking the ball. When the ball is not in anyone’s possession, every player is interested in killing you to keep you away from the ball. This is how the game is supposed to work. Keep in mind that the players are all in a large room. Also, their only weapons are close proximity weapons – the Gravity Hammer, Plasma Sword or beat down. This means that while all the other’s teams players are trying to kill you and your team, your team is also extremely close and can easily kill you or be killed by you. There’s no option to boot for betrayals in Grifball because it is a fact of life in that game. Some players are better at not betraying than others. Some players do it intentionally.



  Aside from the likelihood of betrayal, kills in Grifball mean nothing, yet they’re the only way to get the ball most of the time. And once you’ve got the ball, you’re going to die. It’s not good being Grif. Grifball is a team sport and in order for the team to be successful, the team must work together. A lot of the matches I’ve seen have involved a “random” or a player that’s not friends or associated with the other players on the team. This person usually doesn’t play as part of the team and it causes suffering for the other players. I think Grifball would be better if the players made friends real quick in the lobby, set a plan for how the game should go, then go play, the whole experience would be better for everyone. But that’s just my happy rainbows viewpoint. Whatever.

  Grifball is fun. The players wouldn’t play it if it wasn’t. It’s not for everyone, and it’s not for improving k/d, but it’s a good time when it’s played properly. Besides, what’s more fun than bouncing around smacking hammers against the ground with their satisfying shocking thud.

The Sounds of Halo

 I was sitting on the couch one night, trying to be still in our warm apartment, and Mike was playing his nightly Halo. He had his surround sound headset on and was heavily involved in the game, but he left he sound on the television on as well so I could hear the game. Usually I'm able to block the sounds out because I've heard it so many times before. That night I listened. There are so many sounds in Halo. I thought I'd take a moment to describe them, from my "outsider" perspective.

  The Musical Score: Wow. This is some nice music. It's powerful and woeful, calming and exciting. Chanting monks and rising Manheim Steamroller type guitar riffs meet up with classical instruments. The violin piece is beautiful. The sounds are an excellent introduction to this epic adventure. Any fan would agree.

  The Weapons: There are at least 5 different sounds that the guns make when Mike shoots them. The needler makes a very distinct sound like shards of glass zipping through the air. Anything with a laser, when used properly, makes a long wining sound before it fires. Shotguns sound like shotguns everywhere. The Sniper Rifle makes it's "pikow" perfectly every time. And I really like rockets and the way they hiss as they pass. There are a variety of grenades, stickies are my favorite, but I don't really know any sound other than the explosion they make. And their explosions sound the same to me. I'll make sure to listen closely for a variation and make an edit later if needed.

  The Creatures: There are a variety of creatures in the Halo universe. The Hunters growl and mumble. Brutes do a different type of growl and chatter in their own language. Grunts are my favorite. They have their own language too, they sound like cracked out five year olds sometimes. When they get shot in the head they explode into a celebration of cheers with confetti. There's also a faint popping noise which I didn't hear at first but now that I hear it, it makes the Grunts even more special to me. They remind me of balloons.

  The Vehicles: I'm not so good at telling the difference in vehicles. Sometimes, the only way I know they're Covenant vehicles is because they're purple. But there are a few sounds I recognize. The Wraith makes its hover craft, electricity sound. The Warthog sounds like a Jeep. And the stupid Scarab sounds like death. Also lasers. (I played Halo Wars today and lost to the Scarab and the little Scarabs that I can't remember the names of, quickly.)

  The Dying Sounds: Nothing makes the players and the creatures more noisy than the dying sounds. And most of them are pretty dramatic. Elites make a funny "Garr arrghrgghhh" or "Gruuurrrggh" while Spartans usually make some breathy sound and lady Spartans make a sad little girl sound. Sometimes I listen to the game just for the sounds, especially when there're Elites playing. 

  The Referee Guy: I don't know what he's really called and Mike was in the

middle of a round of Firefight as I was writing this, so I didn't find out. (It causes lag if I browse the internet, he doesn’t hear me when he's got his headphones on, you understand.) Anyway, he announces the game type and medals awarded during the game. He says things like, "Grifball" "Slayer" "Perfection" and "Game over."  I can judge the quality of a game by the medals that the guy is calling out. I know that if he says a lot of things like "Triple Kill" "Running Riot" "Extermination" or "Untouchable" the game is going well. If it's just a bunch of "Double kill" and "Killjoy" it's not such an awesome game. For me, the one time I got a double kill, it was the best game ever.

 The Firefight Voices: These are fun. I don't think I've heard all of them, but I recognize Master Chief, Auntie Dot, Cortana, Sargent Johnson and Noble 6. These voices tell you things about the status of your soldier and the surrounding enemy. For example, Auntie Dot says something like, "Your vital signs indicate that you are dead." It's hilarious. (Not the dying part, the fact that she breaks it down like that.) I also like it when Noble 6 gets excited about killing a whole lot of grunts.

  The Players: There are a variety of words that people don't use in polite society. A game of Halo Reach online is generally not considered polite society. In fact, the only time that Mike watches his language is if he is aware that there is a child in the game with them, or in the room with him. The rest of the time, the potty mouthing flows freely. Not to say that I mind, I'm a potty mouth myself, it's just one of the sounds. And all of the players talk this way. They even come up with creative and crafty names for each other, new phrases and insults and new ways to get a rise out of each other. It's all part of the fun.

  So Halo, as pretty as it is, is also sometimes fun to listen to. I particularly like the dying sounds and the noises that the creatures make and the referee cheering my honey on. When you listen, what do you hear?

Why I Don't Play Halo

  You may be asking yourself why I haven't joined in with the Halo fun instead of becoming a Halo widow. It's not because I don't like the game; honestly I think it's a visual masterpiece and the gameplay itself is often entertaining to watch. My resistance to playing Halo also has nothing to do with the fact that I'm a girl. I can think of a few ladies that would deny any knowledge of me if I so much as hinted that girls shouldn't or don't play Halo. The truth is I don't play Halo unless I'm handed a controller and plopped in front of a TV screen but I have my reasons.

  There are 3 reasons I don't play Halo.

• I'm a fidgety, twitchy, spaz most of the time. This means that when I try to look slightly to my left, I move my Spartans head all the way around. Or, I end up staring at the sky or ground, stuck in a corner because I turned to hard to the right.  Too often I resort to "pray and spray" because I have no idea what I'm shooting at. And I'm highly likely to betray you. I once killed the nice friend of Mike's repeatedly when he came into our game to save me from the second reason I don't play Halo.

• It's not his fault that I'm a spaz and can't control my Spartan. But playing Halo with Mike is like playing hide and go seek for a really long time. Here's how it goes - Mike sets up a game of Slayer, just him and I, where I get to practice trying to aim and shoot at him. (It's really that pitiful.) I miss a bunch of shots then eventually manage to take down his armor. Then, he kills me while I try to get my cross hairs to stay red long enough to shoot at him again. He's not a bully, he's just a good player and I'm an opponent regardless of who I am. It's the same way he plays when he games against his other friends. This being the case, I die a lot. Every time I die, I respawn somewhere else and I'm lost because of the first person point of view. I start running around, sometimes off the edge of something. Most of the time Mike finds me, kills me and the process starts over again. I don't know about you, but there's only so many times I can die before I start to get tired of watching my corpse while I respawn. Online gaming is out of the question because of my inability to aim and shoot before getting killed. Firefight, on the other hand, is pretty fun. I know what I'm supposed to kill and I'm not the only thing for Mike to kill. Also, the "pray and spray" technique works pretty well as long as there's no one else around.
• The Halo Universe is beautiful. I'd much rather look at it and listen to it than anything. And the Grunts are adorable. I tried to play the Halo 3 campaign to get better at shooting, even bought my own copy for the occasion, but got too caught up in the world. (And sometimes too lost.)

 
  It's not for lack of trying, Lord knows I have, but Halo is just not my game. I did play Halo Wars (the RPG) and have been known to run through a few rounds of skirmish, but again, never online because I'm too quickly pwned.

  On the rare occasion that I do play, I'm quick to hand off the controller to the next anxious gamer that I know will enjoy it. It always makes them happy, and I can get back to watching it.

 

In the Beginning...

  The XBOX360 first came into my life in April 2006 when good fortune gave my boyfriend Mike and I the extra money to buy one. Of course, when you have the console, you’ve got to get some games for it. If you recall, some of the original XBOX games were compatible with the new version of the console. Plus, they were slightly less expensive than 360 games, so we picked a couple. Halo Combat Evolved was among them. My boyfriend had already played through this game while he was deployed, but he enjoyed it and like I said, we needed a game. We picked up Halo 2 at the same time and Mike played it through.

  Halo 2 introduced online multi-player options which meant that Mike could now gather with a bunch of friends or strangers and play Slayer, where one team battles the other to get the most kills, and Objective like capture the flag, king of the hill and oddball. It was great. Needless to say, Mike really liked playing Halo 2 online with his friends.

  Eventually we picked up Crackdown, a fun open world game made by Bungie, which included a beta for Halo 3. Once the beta launched, Mike was hooked. He spent nearly every available moment playing online games. It was a limited engagement and would only be around for a few weeks, so he had to get as much time in as possible. When the beta was gone, Mike picked up Halo 2 to fill the three months before Halo 3 launched.

  On September 17^th 2007, the XBOX360 suffered what is called the Red Ring of Death. Yes, just 8 days before the launch of the much anticipated Halo 3, with the day off of work already scheduled and plans to attend the midnight release in progress, our XBOX was dead. Luckily it was still covered under warranty because Microsoft said “That red ring is happening too often and we’re going to fix it.” But it would take 6-8 weeks to repair it. This wasn’t going to work at all. So, that very night he took the money that we had available (it seemed unlikely that we’d have enough but somehow we did) and went to buy another XBOX360. It was close to midnight and there was no choice but Walmart. They only had the elite edition available. “Shucks,” Mike said although I’m sure he was thinking “Woohoo!” (I’ll admit, the black XBOX is sexy. The new one, even sexier.)

  On September 24^th, 2007 Mike and I gathered at the store closest to our work into the most disorganized and uncomfortable “release party” I’ve ever attended. Finally, Halo 3 would make its way back to our living room. We took the game home and Mike began the mission, taking in the sights and sounds while I slept the night away.

  Mike’s sciatic nerve was not prepared for the amount of sitting he would do.

  And so, I became a Halo widow. Lucky for me, I’m good at entertaining myself and I’ve got great fodder for a blog series. There’re many Halo widow stories to tell.